Superb.

Yeah, good to see some new stuff.

Ooh Yeah.

Good stuff. Soon we can form a mob and shout loud protests at Chacko to have him make his illustrated updates.

#1 The Binder Nage Chronicles.

Ravenus knew there was something amiss the moment he woke up without the faint smell of excreta in his nostrils from the first wave of slum dwellers defecating on the tracks.The morning light was like a thin veil of mist and looking out of his bedroom window he could faintly make out what appeared to be clothes hung out to dry on a endless clothesline at the farside of the tracks.Ravenus tried to make sense of this but decided to take a dump instead and think later when his cellphone rang.It was Ladduprasad and he sounded frantic and incoherent but that was normal.Ravenus hung up and went to shit. It was full daylight when he emerged after 2 hours. Looking out of his window towards the railway tracks he could now understand why there was no smell. The clothes hung on the clothes line were actually the early morning defecators impaled on Long stout Bamboo poles , the ones used to erect temporary shelters for festivals and marriages. The train of impaled defecators went on as far as the eye could see, some of them had slid through the pole all the way down and were face down or face up on the ground. the cellphone showed 75 missed calls. Ravenus slowly put on his working clothes as he sipped a cup of tea.The doorbell rang and he was certain it was a deputy calling him regarding the human clothesline.Being a commissioner of police is never too easy.Ravenus wished he had a pair of binoculars so that he could take a better look at the defecators. were some of them impaled through thier assholes as they shat ?

Laddu Prasad was at the door looking more dishevelled as usual.Between huffs he managed to tell Ravenus what had happened.There were no witnesses and only one survivor. Nobody seemed to understand how someone shitting on the railway tracks in public view would get impaled.Laddu Prasad kept the monotonous partly incoherent chatter in the police van but Ravenus was thinking of other things. This had to be kvlt magik. There was no other way dozens of people in a mega-city would get impaled and not make a fuss enough to attract attention. Kvlt Magik had been banned and its practictioners hunted down and imprisoned or killed over 200 hundred years ago. The last known incidence of kvlt magik was over 180 years ago when one of the magicians had escaped from prison and had castrated dozens of pavement dwellers using a tricyle with blades.

The atrocity site was already teeming with reporters when they arrived. The impaled looked like a gargantuan flat art installation. flies and carrion were feasting on the corpses most of whose insides had spilled out. Yes a few of them had been impaled through thier assoles.'Very impressive" thought ravenus and looked wistfully over at the papparazzi. He decided to leave Laddu Prasad with them. He would suitably confuse them without telling them anything that wasnt apparent. The only survior had been taken to a nearby hospital. He had been impaled through his ass and had somehow managed to reach the nearby slums dragging the stake all the way dripping blood and shit.According to the slum dwellers who had found him he claimed to have seen a great big shadow hovering over him before he was impaled.He was obviously in critical condition and wasnt available for questioning but Ravenus doubted if he could be of any help. There was only one person who could possibly distill some reason in this bleeding anal chaos. Ravenus decided to meet Trollkien the tantrik.

Ravenus quickly indicated to Laddu Prasad that he was leaving and got into the Van. He was thankful for the reprieve. Outside the near and dear ones of the impaled were raising a cacophonic din which sent shudders down ones spine. He looked outside at the dogs and crows circling the dead for a moment and then he was lost in his musings.

The journos kept peppering Laddu Prasad with ridiculous questions and he was finding it increasingly difficult to answer them with a straight face.It looked like his replies seemed to make no sense to them until he told a female journalist that her cunt would probably know the answer.The commisioner called out to him at that moment and told him he was leaving for a meeting asking him to hold fort. The journos were distracted but only for a second.The female with the clever cunt held a chappal in one hand and was rapidly approaching LP. There were others besides her with similar intentions. This was turning out to be a really bad day.


"fuck" ejaculated Rahul chacko as a pithy prologue to the thoughts running through his head this morning.He felt a need to read marcus aurelius. Until six months ago he was a game designer called chaxster working for a sindhi game developer called toofani lalwani and not the Tyler durden character he had become.And all because of a game called Jehadi conqueror which Chacko had written exactly six months ago after fucking a brain-washed religious bigot chick called furzaana.He had distributed the game free on the web that night and become a messianic figure. The game was downloaded 20 million times in 3 days and the toofani lalwani servers had gone kaput after that.He was fired from his job , arrested and the game banned in 141 countries world wide on the same day.He was released a month later and found the world a different place. Jehadi conqueror clubs were everywhere... " The first rule of jehadi conqueror is you dont talk about jehadi conqueror ".He had an army of game developers now working on the games new releases and his bank accounts never seemed to ever run out of money. He had private jets loaned to him for travel from unknown admirers and he had moved into a colonial bunglow in the most exclusive part of town.The keys and the papers had been sent to him via courier.Furzaana and dozens of others took care of his every need.furzaana murmured softly in her sleep distracting him from his inner rambling.Chacko felt his manhood rise. Meditiations would have to wait for now.It was time for a blowjob from his favorite houri.

As the van crawled its way through traffic Ravenus tried to recall unusual incidents over the last six months. A certain series of incidents that had happened around six months ago were definitely extraordinary.The police had arrested a youth who had written an extremely offensive computer game.Ravenus recalled his employer toofani "too Funny" Lalwani. "Call me Too Funny ji". The name of the young man who had written the game was Rahul something. He seemed very unlike the "trouble make" , "Psycho" and "drug addict" description given by Too Funny.He was sombre and almost repentant about his act and kept his composure throughout the day as Too Funny went live on all the channels abusing him with unnatural glee. "Too Funny" went missing two days after and a week later he was delivered in a box to one of the Tv channels. his genitals had been ripped off and stuffed into his mouth. "Not Funny At All" has been crudely tatooted onto his forehead.

The news of the impalement was in every channel that he flipped to and Sodom Hussein's excitement seemed to mount every second. His mind raced back to the old tales of Kvlt Magik sorcerers. Only they would have the power and gall.He remembered a tale about how buggshash the insane had built four flame throwing trebuchets and set them up in the four corners of a sprawling slum city. The trebuchets had started flinging molten lava rocks at the slums and completely burnt the squatters city to the ground.He wondered if the rumours of buggshash being the demon Knight that never dies were true.He hoped they were true and that he was back creating mayhem.He could definitely count sodom as his acolyte. The thought thrilled Sodom. He had an army now of 'Jehadi conquerors' and would prove useful to buggshash the insane.Buggshash the Demon Knight king of sorcerors

Startled by Sodoms sudden appearance in the room Furzaana almost bit off Chackos pecker. Chacko swore loudly and gave Sodom an ugly stare as furzaana attempted to gather her under garments and leave the room.She dared not look at Sodom who sneered at her."We have to leave now ",sodom said to chacko in a voice respectful yet completely bereft of emotion," something important has come up"."Wait outside", said chacko as he slowly got off the bed and started putting on his clothes.Is sodom really my man friday ? thought chacko because for all his ingratiating manner and his desire to fulfill every needless wish that chacko had , he seemed to be slowly controlling every aspect of chackos life. Who is Sodom Hussain ? thought chacko. could he be the real brain behind the Jehadi Conquerors clubs ? Chacko for the life of him could not remember when or how he had met sodom hussain for the first time. He could think clearly once the mescaline trip ended but for now he thought it better to do as Sodom asked him to.

Ravenus looked out of the window of the Van at the Trollkien tower which was shaped like a headless bird in flight. There were many urban Legends of the Tower one of which was how it was created in a day by destroying the shanty that had stood in its place along with its inhabitants.The tower was still officially registered as Shanti Nivas ( how ironic!) . As soon as the gates opened Ravenus got out of the Van and signalled tothe driver to head home. He felt a chill down his spine as he entered the tower grounds.There was not a soul in sight as usual and the gates had been opened by Magik. He wondered if Trollkiens one eyed gorgoyle cryptic myth was around. There was a single elevator sshaped like a coffin and Ravenus entered it with a sense of foreboding as before.The music coming out of the elevator speakers was 'Atrocity Exhibition' by Joy Division.

"Asylums with doors open wide,
Where people had paid to see inside,
For entertainment they watch his body twist
Behind his eyes he says, i still exist.

This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside."

The lift opened out into a room that Ravenus had not been in before but this was not surprising. Trollkien was known to keep redecorating and recreating his tower all the time like a new age winchester mansion only more sinister. The entire room had the ambience of a coronation hall and Ravenus could see trollkiens gorgoyle cryptic myth dressed in what looked like a roman toga with a very elaborate headgear straight out of B.R.Chopras Mahabharat. And then he saw trollkien sitting on what looked like a throne and he was fucking blue ! Trollkien was completely painted in blue and had a feather on top of his head! "I am krishna" he said turning around as the speakers in the room played the "Mahabharat" theme. "Fuck" thought Ravenus as if there was nothing left to do but helplessly watch his senses get raped. "I know why you come mortal" said trollkien and Ravenus shuddered at the prospect of having to listen to the entire bhagvad gita. "Here you will find the answers to your questions . Now go and leave me in Peace" said the new age Krishna in a sombre tone. Ravenus grabbed the tome offered and headed towards the lift as soon as he could not looking back. He could hear cryptic myth snickering in the corner.

G.K felt the flatulence in him move around his belly as if it had second thoughts about escaping because it had a premonition that G.K's ass was going to be up for grabs soon.
Sodom Hussein was here to collect in the name of the Mercyful and most considerate and peaceful one and G.K was short of funds. His firm PYM P O communications was a front for an elaborate money laundering racket which had originally catered to middle level sindhi business men who wanted to send money to india or overseas without having to worry about the legal implications of it.things were good but not great so when Sodom Hussein walked into his office one fine day with a million dollars in cash G.K knew this was it.the big one. He would have grabbed the chance even for a 2 percent commission but Sodom Hussein who looked like an Afghan warload with a bad skin Rash offered him 5 percent.Over the next few months G.K was the sole caretaker of over a billion dollars in cash. He sent them to various places all over the world in different currencies and pocketed not only the commission but also fudged the exchange rates and pocketed the difference. Nobody seemed to notice until now or thats what he thought. Sodom had kept tabs on him right from the start and had a full account of every single cent/paisa he had pilfered and it ran into millions.
And now Sodom was here with his prophet ( Rahul Chacko to the dhimmis) and he was ready to "strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers". "Do you have the money ? " Sodom wanted to know. G.K knew that any answer would lead to physical suffering but a yes would probably result in lesser physical discomforts. "Yes". Sodom had what looked like an electric cattle prod in his hands
and G.K has the vague feeling that he wouldnt be sitting comfortably again on his aeron chair anytime soon.

aah crap!

Buggshash wrote:
#1 The Binder Nage Chronicles.

Ravenus knew there was something amiss the moment he woke up without the faint smell of excreta in his nostrils from the first wave of slum dwellers defecating on the tracks.The morning light was like a thin veil of mist and looking out of his bedroom window he could faintly make out what appeared to be clothes hung out to dry on a endless clothesline at the farside of the tracks.Ravenus tried to make sense of this but decided to take a dump instead and think later when his cellphone rang.It was Ladduprasad and he sounded frantic and incoherent but that was normal.Ravenus hung up and went to shit. It was full daylight when he emerged after 2 hours. Looking out of his window towards the railway tracks he could now understand why there was no smell. The clothes hung on the clothes line were actually the early morning defecators impaled on Long stout Bamboo poles , the ones used to erect temporary shelters for festivals and marriages. The train of impaled defecators went on as far as the eye could see, some of them had slid through the pole all the way down and were face down or face up on the ground. the cellphone showed 75 missed calls. Ravenus slowly put on his working clothes as he sipped a cup of tea.The doorbell rang and he was certain it was a deputy calling him regarding the human clothesline.Being a commissioner of police is never too easy.Ravenus wished he had a pair of binoculars so that he could take a better look at the defecators. were some of them impaled through thier assholes as they shat ?

Laddu Prasad was at the door looking more dishevelled as usual.Between huffs he managed to tell Ravenus what had happened.There were no witnesses and only one survivor. Nobody seemed to understand how someone shitting on the railway tracks in public view would get impaled.Laddu Prasad kept the monotonous partly incoherent chatter in the police van but Ravenus was thinking of other things. This had to be kvlt magik. There was no other way dozens of people in a mega-city would get impaled and not make a fuss enough to attract attention. Kvlt Magik had been banned and its practictioners hunted down and imprisoned or killed over 200 hundred years ago. The last known incidence of kvlt magik was over 180 years ago when one of the magicians had escaped from prison and had castrated dozens of pavement dwellers using a tricyle with blades.

The atrocity site was already teeming with reporters when they arrived. The impaled looked like a gargantuan flat art installation. flies and carrion were feasting on the corpses most of whose insides had spilled out. Yes a few of them had been impaled through thier assoles.'Very impressive" thought ravenus and looked wistfully over at the papparazzi. He decided to leave Laddu Prasad with them. He would suitably confuse them without telling them anything that wasnt apparent. The only survior had been taken to a nearby hospital. He had been impaled through his ass and had somehow managed to reach the nearby slums dragging the stake all the way dripping blood and shit.According to the slum dwellers who had found him he claimed to have seen a great big shadow hovering over him before he was impaled.He was obviously in critical condition and wasnt available for questioning but Ravenus doubted if he could be of any help. There was only one person who could possibly distill some reason in this bleeding anal chaos. Ravenus decided to meet Trollkien the tantrik.

Ravenus quickly indicated to Laddu Prasad that he was leaving and got into the Van. He was thankful for the reprieve. Outside the near and dear ones of the impaled were raising a cacophonic din which sent shudders down ones spine. He looked outside at the dogs and crows circling the dead for a moment and then he was lost in his musings.

The journos kept peppering Laddu Prasad with ridiculous questions and he was finding it increasingly difficult to answer them with a straight face.It looked like his replies seemed to make no sense to them until he told a female journalist that her cunt would probably know the answer.The commisioner called out to him at that moment and told him he was leaving for a meeting asking him to hold fort. The journos were distracted but only for a second.The female with the clever cunt held a chappal in one hand and was rapidly approaching LP. There were others besides her with similar intentions. This was turning out to be a really bad day.


"fuck" ejaculated Rahul chacko as a pithy prologue to the thoughts running through his head this morning.He felt a need to read marcus aurelius. Until six months ago he was a game designer called chaxster working for a sindhi game developer called toofani lalwani and not the Tyler durden character he had become.And all because of a game called Jehadi conqueror which Chacko had written exactly six months ago after fucking a brain-washed religious bigot chick called furzaana.He had distributed the game free on the web that night and become a messianic figure. The game was downloaded 20 million times in 3 days and the toofani lalwani servers had gone kaput after that.He was fired from his job , arrested and the game banned in 141 countries world wide on the same day.He was released a month later and found the world a different place. Jehadi conqueror clubs were everywhere... " The first rule of jehadi conqueror is you dont talk about jehadi conqueror ".He had an army of game developers now working on the games new releases and his bank accounts never seemed to ever run out of money. He had private jets loaned to him for travel from unknown admirers and he had moved into a colonial bunglow in the most exclusive part of town.The keys and the papers had been sent to him via courier.Furzaana and dozens of others took care of his every need.furzaana murmured softly in her sleep distracting him from his inner rambling.Chacko felt his manhood rise. Meditiations would have to wait for now.It was time for a blowjob from his favorite houri.

As the van crawled its way through traffic Ravenus tried to recall unusual incidents over the last six months. A certain series of incidents that had happened around six months ago were definitely extraordinary.The police had arrested a youth who had written an extremely offensive computer game.Ravenus recalled his employer toofani "too Funny" Lalwani. "Call me Too Funny ji". The name of the young man who had written the game was Rahul something. He seemed very unlike the "trouble make" , "Psycho" and "drug addict" description given by Too Funny.He was sombre and almost repentant about his act and kept his composure throughout the day as Too Funny went live on all the channels abusing him with unnatural glee. "Too Funny" went missing two days after and a week later he was delivered in a box to one of the Tv channels. his genitals had been ripped off and stuffed into his mouth. "Not Funny At All" has been crudely tatooted onto his forehead.

The news of the impalement was in every channel that he flipped to and Sodom Hussein's excitement seemed to mount every second. His mind raced back to the old tales of Kvlt Magik sorcerers. Only they would have the power and gall.He remembered a tale about how buggshash the insane had built four flame throwing trebuchets and set them up in the four corners of a sprawling slum city. The trebuchets had started flinging molten lava rocks at the slums and completely burnt the squatters city to the ground.He wondered if the rumours of buggshash being the demon Knight that never dies were true.He hoped they were true and that he was back creating mayhem.He could definitely count sodom as his acolyte. The thought thrilled Sodom. He had an army now of 'Jehadi conquerors' and would prove useful to buggshash the insane.Buggshash the Demon Knight king of sorcerors

Startled by Sodoms sudden appearance in the room Furzaana almost bit off Chackos pecker. Chacko swore loudly and gave Sodom an ugly stare as furzaana attempted to gather her under garments and leave the room.She dared not look at Sodom who sneered at her."We have to leave now ",sodom said to chacko in a voice respectful yet completely bereft of emotion," something important has come up"."Wait outside", said chacko as he slowly got off the bed and started putting on his clothes.Is sodom really my man friday ? thought chacko because for all his ingratiating manner and his desire to fulfill every needless wish that chacko had , he seemed to be slowly controlling every aspect of chackos life. Who is Sodom Hussain ? thought chacko. could he be the real brain behind the Jehadi Conquerors clubs ? Chacko for the life of him could not remember when or how he had met sodom hussain for the first time. He could think clearly once the mescaline trip ended but for now he thought it better to do as Sodom asked him to.

Ravenus looked out of the window of the Van at the Trollkien tower which was shaped like a headless bird in flight. There were many urban Legends of the Tower one of which was how it was created in a day by destroying the shanty that had stood in its place along with its inhabitants.The tower was still officially registered as Shanti Nivas ( how ironic!) . As soon as the gates opened Ravenus got out of the Van and signalled tothe driver to head home. He felt a chill down his spine as he entered the tower grounds.There was not a soul in sight as usual and the gates had been opened by Magik. He wondered if Trollkiens one eyed gorgoyle cryptic myth was around. There was a single elevator sshaped like a coffin and Ravenus entered it with a sense of foreboding as before.The music coming out of the elevator speakers was 'Atrocity Exhibition' by Joy Division.

"Asylums with doors open wide,
Where people had paid to see inside,
For entertainment they watch his body twist
Behind his eyes he says, i still exist.

This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside.
This is the way, step inside."

The lift opened out into a room that Ravenus had not been in before but this was not surprising. Trollkien was known to keep redecorating and recreating his tower all the time like a new age winchester mansion only more sinister. The entire room had the ambience of a coronation hall and Ravenus could see trollkiens gorgoyle cryptic myth dressed in what looked like a roman toga with a very elaborate headgear straight out of B.R.Chopras Mahabharat. And then he saw trollkien sitting on what looked like a throne and he was fucking blue ! Trollkien was completely painted in blue and had a feather on top of his head! "I am krishna" he said turning around as the speakers in the room played the "Mahabharat" theme. "Fuck" thought Ravenus as if there was nothing left to do but helplessly watch his senses get raped. "I know why you come mortal" said trollkien and Ravenus shuddered at the prospect of having to listen to the entire bhagvad gita. "Here you will find the answers to your questions . Now go and leave me in Peace" said the new age Krishna in a sombre tone. Ravenus grabbed the tome offered and headed towards the lift as soon as he could not looking back. He could hear cryptic myth snickering in the corner.

G.K felt the flatulence in him move around his belly as if it had second thoughts about escaping because it had a premonition that G.K's ass was going to be up for grabs soon.
Sodom Hussein was here to collect in the name of the Mercyful and most considerate and peaceful one and G.K was short of funds. His firm PYM P O communications was a front for an elaborate money laundering racket which had originally catered to middle level sindhi business men who wanted to send money to india or overseas without having to worry about the legal implications of it.things were good but not great so when Sodom Hussein walked into his office one fine day with a million dollars in cash G.K knew this was it.the big one. He would have grabbed the chance even for a 2 percent commission but Sodom Hussein who looked like an Afghan warload with a bad skin Rash offered him 5 percent.Over the next few months G.K was the sole caretaker of over a billion dollars in cash. He sent them to various places all over the world in different currencies and pocketed not only the commission but also fudged the exchange rates and pocketed the difference. Nobody seemed to notice until now or thats what he thought. Sodom had kept tabs on him right from the start and had a full account of every single cent/paisa he had pilfered and it ran into millions.
And now Sodom was here with his prophet ( Rahul Chacko to the dhimmis) and he was ready to "strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers". "Do you have the money ? " Sodom wanted to know. G.K knew that any answer would lead to physical suffering but a yes would probably result in lesser physical discomforts. "Yes". Sodom had what looked like an electric cattle prod in his hands
and G.K has the vague feeling that he wouldnt be sitting comfortably again on his aeron chair anytime soon.

The strains of the suprabhata from the shiva temple mingled with the calls of the muzzezin from the mosque as Vile E felt the mescaline kick into his blood stream and mingle with the marijuana and cocaine cocktail he had consumed earlier.He could see the whole galaxy spinning inside his head and he was a giant cicada playing the divine music with his body, consuming the space between heaven and earth. There were colours beyond imagination , beyond madness which the eye could not see or the brain could not comprehend. He was the omniscient , omnipotent , the om of the universe. A large Door exploded in front of him , struck by a monstrous meteorite of blue shaped like the foot of a GOD and as he looked up towards the father heavens he could see GOD with his blazing eyes , resplendent carrying a large golden box shaped like a coffin which was emanating smoke and ash like a volcano. Then the Blue meteoric foot struck him on the face and he fell into emptiness...

Fuck! That was astounding. Chacko, depending on the mood this finds him in is either rubbing his hands in glee or slumped in a corner, weeping.

Vile E lay in a pool of Blood that was slowly taking the shape of what looked like an Hex . His head had been crushed and mangled by the boot so badly it looked like an exploded garbage bin with bits of brain matter and bone sticking out of the blood pool. A large coffin very elaborately carved with runes was lying in a corner under the watchful eyes of a man who had fire bolts emerging from his eyes.Blue and orange with a hiss and crackle. He raised his head to the skies and started chanting softly and then in rising crescendo and finally in screams , 'Ia la la fthng na la ga bu bugg shash vat ta '.

Where is the Like button when you fucking need one? This is proving to be all manners of awesome.