oh dang. Banged this out and forgot about posting it. Here goes.
What to do in
Delhi when there for a month
Welcome Symphony 21, to the magical mystery tour. The capital is famous for several things – its monuments, great food, shopping, awesome weather and good looking women. A brief guide to all of them follows.
First, a note on the weather. Delhi has awesome weather – in winters. Sadly those are long gone and you have a month of 40 degree heat ahead of you. Since you probably come from the mallu-tam village of palakkad (like 90% of the people who post on kvltsite) this may not be a factor for you. Personally, I find running around in the day somewhat ill advised but don’t let that stop you from trying the fine tradition of death due to heat stroke.
Delhi is a vast city spread over several million square kilometres so public transport might be a shade uneven. The Metro covers broad portions of the city while buses tend to cover the rest. The city does treat you a lot better if you have a car. In the absence of this you can, of course find someone who has a car and ask them to ferry you around. Should that not work out they have a bunch of somewhat expensive meru cabs around the place. Otherwise you can fall back on the delhi auto guys. While not as vile as those in Chennai the Delhi guys will try to rip you off and speak mostly Hindi. Getting some sense of how much a trip is going to cost you before departing is probably a good idea (independent of whether or not they use the meters). Last time I was there i was roughly paying 60 bucks for a 10km journey. Go with the mentality that you will take a 20% hit on the auto fare and you should be fine.
Monuments – well you have the standard Humayun’s tomb / India gate / Red Fort tourist traps. Personally, this doesn’t really work for me as old monuments tend to be just
there. However, if going up to old buildings and staring at em does it for you, knock yourself out. A few years back the horticulture department did put in some effort into the gardens around these places so going for a walk thereabouts might be of interest. I’d suggest hitting Humayun’s tomb (which used to stay open later than the standard 6pm closing time), the Lodhi gardens or the Delhi ridge (beware the gazillion monkeys) for a stroll. You can also try the sound and light show at red fort held after sunset (I’ve never been there but I remember people saying it was the cat's whiskers). There are a huge number of smaller structures tucked away in the city which the ASI has restored over the years but I would be hard pressed to remember where any of those are. All I do remember is that some historical society used to conduct short tours of these places. Some google might help.
The smaller places generally tend make for interesting short trips. Eg., this (
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agrasen_ki_Baoli) structure was being used as a garbage dump for several decades until some enterprising fellow took decided to clear the huge number of plastic bags which littered the slightly sunken courtyard. Buried beneath they discovered about fifty steps which lead down to a step well which still had clear water (plastic contamination notwithstanding). There are also other structures like Mirza Ghalib’s haveli which you can rent out for weddings and the like (
www.zeenews.com/past/2009-12-22/589399news.html ).
Food – Delhi has a bunch of GREAT places to eat food. If you’re vegetarian stop reading right here and call upon someone else. If not, read on. A short list follows
- Egg Paranthas opposite the Times of India building on Bahadur Shah Zafar MArg
- Momos and fruit beer at one of the North East places in Dilli Haat (near Safdarjung) or outsite Chanakya cinema or
- Burra kabab and other fun non-vegetarian fare at Karim’s in Jama Masjid. Do not do something stupid like going and ordering vegetarian fare (hello hathya!).
- Go to Khan Market near the Lodhi Gardens and generally make your way through the bunch of places offering all kinds of awesome food (khan chacha’s for rolls, Al bak-something or the other for shwarma). Tons of places for various other cuisines as well.
- if you’re not on a tight budget hit Bukhara in the ITC Maurya. It’s supposed to be one of the best Indian restaurants on the planet. Advance bookings would probably be advisable
- (assuming you’re from the great south) Sarvana Bhavan to have dosas. Then complain loudly about how it’s a travesty that a dosa costs 60 rupees while you get it at the Murugan idli stall for 1/10th the cost.
- bunch of great places in the various circles of Connaught place. Nizam’s rolls etc etc.
- another bunch of places in Defence Colony / M Block (GK) to hang around and have coffee at.
Seriously, there’s a ton of places all over the city and food should really not be a problem. Unless you insist on a diet of only south Indian food with a cap of 15 bucks per meal.
Hit Darya Ganj on a Sunday morning around 10:30-11am for one of the largest second hand book markets around. There’s a bunch of other bookstores like fact and fiction and teksons all over the place but I really can’t vouch for how good they are now. Also, check out the internet to see if any of the book fairs is happening in delhi at the time. Might be worth a dekko.
If so inclined, hit Palika Bazaar, beneath the Connaught Place central gardens to pirate your movies and games and all manners of man/woman/animal dvds.
You can also visit Paharganj (opposite the New Delhi Railway Station)- a hippie stopoever must which is known as the place where most of Dev D was filmed and as the location for headlines like “tourist found murdered in hotel room”. It’s quite safe in the day assuming you don’t wander down tiny alleyways hoping to score (tail or grass). If you want this is where you can actually get with man/woman/animal. There were a couple of decent cafes in the place and it should make for an interesting visit.
Btw while visiting places liked Jama Masjid be very careful with your shoes because its unlikely that you’ll see them again after leaving them outside. FYI if you do lose em at jama masjid you have to walk back though a street lined with butcher shops while stepping through a fine mixture of blood, mud and animal piss.
If you’re culturally inclined check out the listings for plays held in Delhi. Advance bookings would typically be a good idea. Popular venues are Kamani, Sirifort, National School of Drama etc. If the plays suck you should find entertainment in conversations like "It's alright but its no shakespeare" during plays like The Tempest.
Delhi also has a huge number of good looking women. Whether you do any of them is really up to you. If you strike out I suggest going with “but back home you can talk to girls”.
should all else fail, I suggest going with Vile E's recommendation of sitting at home and jerking off a lot. (Palika should be of help here)
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